April 30

Minister for forests from GB called on me at my office. I finalized the details for the wetlands environment cttee meeting.
Assembly to see leadership. Gave messages on labour day outside to media. Pml issue wth cod discussed in meeting wth leadership.
went to see an art exhibition of nahid raza my first art teacher.
Express tv javed chaudhry

 

April 29

Mad day but productive day

On desk at 8am- when i am not travelling that is the norm.. newspapers etc. As i glanced thru the swine flu section, I started thinking- I called up my media friends to ask more details. politicians and media people interact a lot. but there are only very very few media people i can count on as friends. And this particular one is one of them. could my isb flu have anything to do with this swine flu and how would we know! they had a great laugh when they thought I was getting worried about my flu. the only person i had been in touch with as far as pigs were considered were my shikaari friends who had been out shooting boars. Anyway we all had a laugh and that was that.

Wrote Sindhi article  on water miscommitments made by the PPP govt despite my environment cttee’s superb recommendations- have a look at the english version in the article section. I intend moving privilege motion soon on this- maybe then this country will stop indulging in provincial disharmony issues and go beyond that to resolve water issues technically.

Few errands – got my hair done! ok so it sounds frivolous but its necessary sometimes to share such frivolus details with you. You know sometimes I wonder how transparent this diary has become! recipees being shared in the middle of serious political cat fights!

Back on desk writing the Urdu article on how Talibans had done everything unreasonable to deserve the operation. Have a look at the English version in the Article section.

I got round to writing these because I was being told off by those who write emails to me…they said there had been too much of a gap on the Sindhi side…so i thought it was necessary to get down to it and write some articles.

By this time it was 3pm…Rushed to the SACH conference on Torture at the Serena, which was to discuss the convention on torture. I pretty much wrote my speech whilst listening to all participants! It was most educative for me. New subject for me in fact. I am very militarized in my thinking as far as these issues are concerned and I spoke from my realistic head not emotional HR heart!

This was ratified by president Musharraf (I found out later).  When my turn came to speak just before the chief guest (the HR minister who was most complementary!), i spoke of  of how at the outset i supported the ratification. That it was a huge challeneg to discuss torture under war against extremism circumstances. the mindset of criminals indoctrinated by alq raw etc was so hardened that torture had become a norm under detention. Extremism as an environment was equally difficult for Law enforcement agencies to function under. That militants were not functioning under the same code of ethics as demanded by this convention from states! Yet Pak had to move from colonial to democractic policing methodology. But for that political leadership had to move from feudal to democratic in the true sense – by getting rid of uniform president didnt lead to that change of mindset. I said the ratification could only come about when parliament was sensitized. When adjournment motion was moved to discuss. Consdiering how slow parliament was to discuss anything of any worth I didnt have my hopes too high on its time frame. I talked of codification which was required. I also mentioned the June 26 UN day deadline as having some milestones for this roundtable group of experts- we should have some goals for ourselves however small to achieve by then. I talked of how the expectations from police were high whilst the achievements could only be proportional to the investment made in their training etc. I called for transparency in terms of spending foreign aid of WOT on such police reforms. I talked of need for equality for training and salaries amongst provinces (my CM Sindh example!) and equality in terms of poor and rich in terms of egalitarian concept of justice. I talked of how legisaltion was stuck in parliament like my disfiguremnet bill. I mentioned in passing Soofi’s Islamic Robinhoods who could take law in tehir hand unless we didnt put our torture mechanisms straight. I said we needed to beware of creating legislation which allowed militants to get away from being interogated. I ended by saying I would like to work with experts to make ratification possible but keeping pak’s specific needs in WOT/WOE.

I am Hobbesian realist. I am big on human rights but currently with this extremist threat to Pak my threshold for human rights for hardened terrorists is low- I am being honest with you-

Anyway. after that I rushed back to the office for final touches to urdu article.

Meeting with party leadership. rushed to Senate with Ch Shujaat Sahib. Bit of a panic as to how govt had bulldozed a Resolution without PML approval (going back on commitment made in business procedure meeting-very unparliamentary practice by govt) which linked 17th amendment changes with COD vs constitution. Considering we didnt sign COD we didnt approve of this- COD could not be treated as substitute for constitution. I was getting late for a talkshow but this was more important. So I attended the press talk with my leadership at the assembly .

Reached Channel 5- Talkshow on extremism (same script as my urdu article where i gave chronology of mis-statements of militants.) and got fairly abusive about militants.

Home finally- sister’s inlaws over for dinner from Lahore. family time.

Have to write a letter from Environment Chairman to Environment Minister on Wetlands in Northern Area. A demand for shifting base of WB wetland office from NWFP to GB since the wetlands are in GB not in NWFP. Didnt get time during the day. Once the letter is done maybe then I can call it a day. One more example of GB having an issue with NWFP’s big brother unfair tactics!

Karachi under fire. My Karachi… i had been talking about extremist pockets which needed to be cleansed…

 

April 28

caught up wth condolences

wrote standard operating procedures for office!

played golf

waqt tv on talibans at 10pm

 

April 27

Got back from Gilgit in the morning- armed with dayquil/niquil i am trying to manage the day!

interviews for more aides in the afternoon- we have too much on our plate and our team needs to increase-

(not much luck- let me know if there are any young graduates ineterested in being part of my team based in isb)

 

Session-in which we will discuss national security policy – i need to post that huge document for you all to review and comment

–Assembly. My question was on gdp growth rate and all econmic indicators missing targets and not coming to same level as pml govt. No response worthy of any comment by minister

My other question had “reply not recvd on it” it was on banned orgs list in pak. I raised same issue on tv later.

My point of order was on cm sindh not upholding PM announcment of raising police salaries. I said cm sindh is a man in contempt of PM and sindh high court since he was not listening on lecturer issue either.

Finally when ch nisar launched attack on faisal saleh I reminded him that we new parliamentarians didn’t want to learn time wastage activities when there were national security concerns to be debated.  Plus i reminded ch nisar that he had launched attack on pml chaudhry sahibs and faisal had only responded. So I defended my party leadership

Assembly prorogued in a hurry- its a joke! calling us all the way- spending millions on us then proroguing us- we never discussed cttee report!

anyway had to rush and get question file- stand in queue for awhile then rushed for talkshow- have submitted questions- check productivity grid 2009

Dunya tv in the evening with Asma on parliamentary report on security which was not discussed in parliament!

 

April 26

I have called the first Central Working Committee of Gilgit Baltistan in Gilgit today- it will be the first brainstorming session where we will discuss achievements of President Musharraf and PML govt- for election purposes..and hit list of outstanding issues for future resolution

I arrived in Gilgit- For the first time i had massive security with me- its not a good feeling- its good for politicians to roam around freely- but then its better to be responsible because one politician’s killing costs the nation more hassle in terms of law and order other than that politician’s loss- i was staying at the serena which was equally heavily guarded-

We started the meeting- Incredible brainstorming session- ministers, mnas, party office holders were all there- the first half of the brainstorming was most useful for moral boosting- the amount of development and devolution pml govt and President Musharraf had done was unbelievable- it lasted 2 hours- we had a resolution thanking the leadership and also resolving to take this as campaign for our votes- all the development done in rest of pak had not helped pml win on feb 18- this was my biggest challenge to win thru development efforts here- it was a matter of campaign n strategy- citibank style!

Second half was issue list – which i would present to my national assembly cttee and get resolved- cttee members would be happy since they would have it easy – the hit lists- I also had to put this in a presentation and take to PM- that was my challenge to resolve through whatever means- their issues- i would also raise the pertinent ones on the floor of the house – like using bb income forms as election tactics- pre poll rigging-

party organization issues- discussed- resolution planned in strategy meeting later.

lunch- the speaker came over- always good to see him

i wanted to see the site where the killing had happened- they were not v pleased about me insisting – but i convinced them- so speaker me and prez pml gb drove thru that area- simple street which had reigned terror that day and for future days- gilgit was not the gilgit i knew for so many years- eary gilgit..

i realized after a year that gilgit was truly divided on sectarian lines with no go areas- and my ministers who were shia stayed away from sunni areas- this one fact made me sad and angry- we had a country where we had not protected our citizens from sectarian violence – where our citizens couldnt move freely from one area to another, that didnt constitute human rights- we had not upheld free movement clause of constitution- we had a long way to go…

the other issue which i had not felt whole year was divide on ethnic basis- rest of pak was plagued with sindhi vs punjabi vs baloch vs pathan etc- but here too for first time i felt mnas from baltistan complaining about rest of them- i was supposed to be the objective outsider and harmonizer- it was my role which i could undertake by engaging dialogue and getting balti issues resolved- they expected that of me.

also tehre was a generic problem of kana division/ministry treating my ministers and mnas as second class citizens- bureacracy vs parliamentarians was prevalent in rest of country but politicians had prevailed- here i would have to help them-

moreover tehre was another problem of religious leaders being first class citizens here and ruling super supreme- that was a harder nut to crack- it required maturity- i would have to consult by magical experts- there was so much clean up required..

strategy meeting on party affairs was critical- it made me realize that i had to be flexible but firm at the same time- sounds like a contradiction but when you are deciding whats good for the party to succeed this is critical.

dinner with an old associate of my father’s who had been crucial in last elections- this time he was in a govt job and could only watch from outside- he had marked my progress since one year and always had been source of support advice and strength- he was pleased with my activities- that meant something-

slept early- dosed on augmentin- flue throat infection- you know whether a politician is well or not doesnt really matter bec work has to go on. i need to find good vitamins so i survive the future travelling that will be needed.

i am sad about the extremism threat inside gb- its heaven on earth and yet…

 

April 25

Morning at home lazying around for a change.

Went to the office to give views on composite dialogue with india to dawn tv and Radio GB press release.

Picnic with my golf partner’s family at their lands- wheat threshing in progress. sabzi naan and chai..yum..

Wedding of Erum- a very able, positive, responsible team player of my most critical team i ran for a very special leader. She looked grand on the stage. The kind of work this team did and the kind of 24 hour shifts it ran I dont think this kind of madness is done these days. Anyone who survived this team needs a medal!

Dinner with Nisar Sahib, his wonderful family, his Sindhi daughter in law, Zaid Hamid (zz), Brig Usman. Very yummy home cooked food and very enlightening like minded company..I wish I could have stayed longer but had a prior commitment to get to.

Dinner at Asma Shirazi with all my favourite parliamentarians…

 

Isb

My parliamentary aide’s birthday…

Took her and the team out for lunch-

Nosheen is one of the most trusted loyal aides I will probably ever have- Best thing about her is that she has never been afraid to disagree with me- its a struggle convincing her when she disagrees – but its good that as a politician i am not surrounded by phycophants- she is very dedicated and hardworking- and its a pain sending her home- she is a workoholic- she is very nationalist- big patriot- pakistan truly first- very emotional- very grounded- she is my right hand- she manages my meetings and engagements and gives me all the background info needed for all my engagements- its a round the clock responsibility because for each event she has alot of pressure to deliver the right background info- she is actually more powerful because she is empowered to raise or block issues from me- but she has never blocked any issues which have been urgent for me to handle- a parliamentarian’s strength is her aide- its a make or break- and i am lucky that she is very dedicated. i have to admit that in my effort to polish her up and bring her upto speed, i am an impossible boss- i take on so much on my plate that she has a lot on her plate- but we decide ourselves what i can take or not- because its a team- its shared responsibility- mornings are the worst because the pressure i put her thru is fairly tough to manage- but she has learnt how to deal with morning pressure cooker times! in May she will be one year old as an aide and i think she has truly come a long way- she is extremely pushy as well- she wants me to do more and more- which is a true blessing because its good to have that motivator- imagine if i had someone who shirked from work, i wld have a tough time- she is from tribal territory and that probably pushes her more to achieve a breakthrough for her people through me-she has very high morals-she is a good voice of the people-

i would be lost without Nosheen!

Thankyou Nosheen for being a good Pakistani First- Thankyou for serving the people of Pakistan…

 

Skurdu-Isb

Morning baltistan… 8am we were on breakfast table and breakfast meeting started with my team of ministers. Mnas. Party leaders. We primarily discussed election strategy. 3 hour meeting where they spoke their heart out. I gave them a commitment. Despite the situation in rest of country pml wld sweep gb. Why. Bec we were not going to let 8yrs of development historic go down the tube like rest of pak. I wld invest all. I had to. Or else I wld resign as in charge. We will do it. Press conferenc on terrorism: its been my most bombastic ever. I didn’t mince words. My message was: dep speaker killing was attack on pak. Not jst on nala or gb. It was a message from enemies of pak from foreign agencies from their local operatives which I had heard. That other provinces were struggling. And if some of them had appeased we as pml prov govt in gb were not going to give in. Gb was geo strategically critical for pak security n its battle wld be won by gb moderates not talibans. I told the extremist to “get out of gb” and to lay off. On behalf on my party leadership we had condemned this incident first and which is why iwas here first whilst minister was God knows where. That we wld not allow destabilization of pak. I demanded judicial inquiry of this incident and for inquiry report to be presented first to national assembly. That we wld not accept talibanization of gb. That admin failure was to be condemned and shamful and that I wld give dharna in isb till major heads wld not roll in the kana ministry. That we wld not stand by and wait whilst chilas became buner. That I appreciated their patience for not turning this into a sectarian n ethnic issue which terrorist wanted. That govt had obligation to protect all citizens. Includin all mnas ministers political leaders. Workers. I told them that since the pm’s ministers had not briefed him I wld and that I had spoken to pm abt it. I wld not play politics wth the soul of gb. They needed immediate security and pm needed to give it.

After press conference We drove to airport wth my right and left hands. People I trust most. And at the lounge we planned the first formal CWC central working comittee this weekend in gilgit. They shrugged when they heard gilgit. I told them we wld stare at the extremists and not shy back. I wld be dammed if I get scared by their threats. This cwc was supposed to take place yest but it got postponed bec of death. Gilgit is the hQ and we were going to hold the meeting there.

I am enroute isb where we have our first national assembly standing cttee meeting of gb kana division kashmir n northern areas. I hope I make it on time.

I have made it on time- the chairman we have elected is a prince from chitral- at the beginning of meeting after congratualting him i ask him to do fateha for GB dep speaker which he does- meeting done- lets hope we meet soon next time on big issues of gb to solve.

I rush to shop for my mother’s birthday– and then i rush back to assembly for afternoon session-

i spoke on point of order on gb situation- exact same as i did in morning press conference- i have done my job of apprising national politicians of dangers of talibanization in gb-

i got letter prepared for my kana chairman which as his first decision said- inquiry needed on deputy speaker murder and more importantly briefing required on complete security situation- its historically first time this will happen to any gb/kana cttee of assembly- high time- i am pleased i have managed to get chairman to do this on his election day!

home to celebrate my mother’s birthday-

dropped by at whip’s dinner for a short while.

 

isl-lhr-skurdu!

Flight delayed the whole morning to skurdu- yes as usual- it was cancelled last 3 days-i have asked for all weather flights for this territory but to no avail-anyway, today they have diverted this plane with us to lhr and from here we will go to skurdu- sounds warped doesnt it!?all this because they had some problem with the aircraft and needed it swaped in lhr- anyway- on the way to lhr i did something productive in the plane…

wrote my Will…

—-

afternoon- leaving for skurdu from lhr!

My snow peaks your peaks our peaks. Equally stained with enemy attacks. Yes as I land in skurdu I am angry and upset. We have not protected pakistan. Baltistan the most serene place has a state level funeral today. Terrorism at its worst.. As I land I notice a kid sitting next to me samia class 4… As she stares out of the window I tell her to admire and thank this region for indus which feeds rest of pak.she smiles innocently…

At the airport my team is waiting for me. Bad circumstances but I am here for a purpose. I have arrived 5 hours delayed. Instead of morning. It is afternoon now. Anyway its 3.30pm and we have another 3hrs of metalled and non metalled dirt tracks to get to the village where the depty speaker is being buried.

 

On the way I get a call from a friend. He has bad news. My best blue eyed. Best in terms of professionalism competence intelligence. 24yr old Moomal has died. I don’t know how to react. We all worked together as part of a key team. I am in shock. She was getting married. She was happy with life. She wld often sms even though we had both moved on wth our assignments. Her loss is a national loss. She was pakistan’s future leadership. Pure. Pious. Brilliant. Angelic almost. I have never had a right hand in my life who has been so perfect as far as work is concerned. I am the toughest boss. I am v demanding. But with her I didn’t need to open my mouth it wld be done. She cld read me v well and her performance was par excellence. She can’t be dead. Pakistan cld not have lost her. U have no idea how upset I am today. But then I think of her as being in heaven and I have this satisfaction of knowing she is in a better place. I am going to move on with how rest of day progressed. But my mourning for her will be long process. When I wil picture perfect she will be there. At work she was always compared to being mini marvi. Mini monster. But she was better smarter than me hands down. She wld have achieved what I achieved at 36yrs at 26yrs. I don’t know how I will handle tomorw and day after knowing she is not wth us. For now I have blocked it and getting on with my work.

 

My team knows I am upset. Normally it takes me a second to cry. But I am too shocked to cry. They distract me and before I know it I have blocked it. We are discussing threat of talibanization in gb. We reach kharmang. Black flags all along the route. As I cross the wooden bridge. I can sense it. The angry crowd shouting slogans against gilgit against the incompetent n criminal administration. Asking for independence. Why bec we have failed to protect them. As we arrive the men go to the burial ground where there is a semi jalsa going on and I am whisked away to the wife. Its a small dark room. She is hysterical. Many women around her have failed to calm her down. The mnas are sitting around. One of whom has a title a crown but has done everything to ruin it by being the worst lota and corrupt politician. I avoid her. I can’t be hypocritical. Maybe I am a pathetic politician. I sit down. We pray. The hysterics are not ending but its the only way. I think of Moomal. I am still not crying. I am numb. We mourn. I say all the funeral condolence words. I condole on behalf of my leadership and I tell them. I will raise this issue like I have already done at national level. They appreciate me being first to raise it. They appreciate me being first from federation to come to them. Whilst we talk all this whilst they ask me to ask for judicial inquiry. I also Think of how far this place is from isb nerve centre. Its time for me to address the men. I talk to them abt this being an effort at destabilizing not jst gb but pak. Its part of bigger game. Its to try n make shia sunni. Balti gilgiti fight. I get commitment from them they will continue to show saber. Its a long siyassi speech. I am too tired to type it all at 2am since that’s the time now when I am typing my diary page on my blackberry. Anyway I give interviews to 3 channels present there. I am numb but I am saying all that needs to be said.

 

We proceed to the graveyard. All my life with my saudi mom by my side graveyards r forbidden places for women. Anyway as a public rep I need to do what the romans do. And frnakly due to my fathers tolerance for difference upbringing its easy doing it. They go sit by the grave. Its dark. There are two lanterns on grave. They all pray but put fingers in the mud in grave. The tree on top of the grave. Its eiry but not scary. I pray. We go towards the other end of the courtyard. There is an imambarga. I semi enter. Pray. And we move on to the sisters room. She is beating herslef. Matham. I am v uncomfortable wth that. Have always been. She reaches towrads me and wants to use my hands to beat her. I try to calm her down. We move on

 

We drive out of there n one of my mnas wants me to stop for dinner somehwere. It is important for her election campaign to walk in wth marvi memon. I am dead tired and so r the others. But work is work. I accept. We arrive. We r treated to some great balti food. The son of the house. A young man is excited as hell. He saw me on tv yest talking abt luving balti food (dunya tv) and he can’t believe that he is feeding it to me today in his home. It is uncanny anyway. Some of it is great. Some of it is new tasting thus not so great. But I am a good guest and have learnt this from my father. So I complement on what is great. And I quietly eat rest! The tea. The special tea they want me to down. That I can’t handle. Anyway. They present me wth a special woollen shawl (my father has the same) and we leave for skurdu. When I am in gb papa is talked of a lot. It makes me proud. But it puts more pressure on me.

 

On way back we discuss election strategy. I have a plan. Its the only plan. I will need to win but win hands down. My father took them to victory. Got them to form govt. I have so much pressure. But I have a magical plan. I give them that confidence. They give me examples of pml current crumbly state in rest of country. But since I believe I have a winning ploan its easy peasy for me to motivate them and bring them out of doomsday. I look at them and I say that u will be minister. But u will b a real ministr wth real powers. Not like the sham govt we r running today wth all powers in kana ministry. They r getting motivated. It suddenly dawns on me how much travelling and work I have ahead of me. I will have to b there for each of them at their different halqas. Can u imagine the magnitude of my work. What abt my delta. My kerry bashing (by the way I stand vindicated today wth kerry admittin afpak has failed) anyway I wil manage all.

 

We reach skurdu at 11. The chief x -lotas r having dinner in same rest house as I am staying. My ministers are there too. I walk in and say salaam in the most authoritative way possible to the biggest of them. Anyway I move on to the sitting room where my team joins me for a security meeting. My chief of protocol whom I have inherited from my dads days is most nervous. He knows that I am minus the tact of my dad and will not spare any lotas. They insist I invite one fo them. I put my foot down. In the rest of the country I don’t call the shots. We r too kind to them. Here I will work wth my ethics. The lotas want forgiveness I can talk but they can’t be part of the confidential meeting. I also turn down a breakfast invite from one of them who has joined ppp. They thought they cld get me to appease but I don’t like chamberlain.

Anyway the meeting lasts 2hours til 1am!. Its fruitful as hell. i get to hear voice of people- what they have been saying in jalsas etc. My mnas my ministers give me reality check. I call my pary leadership to brief them. They r busy and frnakly gb is really a non issue. They trust me whatever I am doing is great and are glad am safe. They will see me tomorw in isb. Anyway the meeting continues and I realize the gravity of the taliban n indpnt nationalist threat. This calls for not jst complaints and abusing govt. This calls for solving it. I am not oppo anymore. I put on my state boots. I am taking notes from what I want fixed from pm. I call him up. Its late. Midnite but he takes the call. I tell him this is serious business and I will brief him in assembly. He is grateful and promises to fix. The team is impressed at accessability. Even I am happy bec frnakly without that I can’t serve my people. For so many months my arrogance of being tuff cookie opposition  mna stopped me from askin pm for fix its. Then a friend from mqm gave me hell. He said r u here to play politics or will u serve whilst being in oppo. That was turnin point. Now I make pm life hell till he lsitens and tries to implement. Anyway meeting is done.

 

My chit chat wth u is done. Its great weather here. Cold but not so cold like last time minus 6. My protocol tells me we have massive security outside. We didn’t last time but things r different now. I retire to my room and I think. All this in one day.

 

Am I not the luckiest ever that I have found my people whom I can serve Its a deep connection… a love affair with the people who suffer most. Okay I am not getting carried away. I am trying to explain the feeling one has in the villages when one is serving. Its a romance. But its a reality check of miseries too. I love my people like shah’s marui did. I will win for them bec I truly only wish to serve. Gn

 

isb-lhr-isb

Midnite. My deputy speaker nala meaning gilgit baltistan assembly was shot dead in gilgit. He died immediately but they hid it so they cld cordon off then annnounce. I was very upset. Taliban linkage to raw being suspected say some. I demanded investigation and gave statement on behalf of my party leadership. He was shia from peace luvin baltistan shot in gilgit. I called for peace between all sects. We had planned a gala event for next day which ofcourse we cancelled. The entire area was high alert. I wanted to join the funeral. My team being extra protective gave me rough time in terms of green signal. I had to argue till they gave in. I was part of their team and I cld not be kept away from mourning with them. Finally, We decided that I wld join them next day in skurdu since body was going to be taken there for onward burial.

 

Morning I had to catch a flight for lahore. I had couple of events. The first was dunya tv morning show with nadia jamil. I arrived 45 mins late for one hour live program since pia pilots were on go slow strike. Wantin 35percent incremment!! Anyway we made up for it somehow. Nadia and I r both talkative n bubbly. We had great fun. The one question she asked me ..what I wld do as first decision if I got to power top power. I said give gb its provisional provincial status. And give prov autonomy. Abolish concurrent list. I also thought abt it n frnakly first thing wld also b state controlled juma khutbas and madrassa reform.

 

Anyway went home to prepare for my iqbal speech. An old friend came to my rescue. Iqbal’s death anniv big yearly event in lhr to which I was invited as speaker. It was to me a huge honour to be recognized for such an important event- I had been invited by nawai waqt group and when I arrived at lhr alhamra the big rightists columnists and rightists politicians were there. Qazi was to be chief guest wth javed hashmi kaira saad and myself as mna guests. It was a rightist group galore. On the stage when I walked up I looked at the crowd who was furiously chanting nawaz slogans. It was over whelming. No women on stage except me and v few in crowd. What got me unnerved were the slogans. I had not calculated that there wld be such a distinct nawaz crowd. Anyway ataullahaq kasmi who was sitting next to me told me that when I wld make speech it had to b short so I didn’t get hooted down considering this crowd was not such big fans of pmlQ. And that I was to avoid anything controversial. Critical advice since normally I always do say controversial things. thankGod he told me this- honestly i wld not have had the sense to avoid my usual bantering had he not warned me–

I went up and performed. My speech text was as follows: I explained I was novice but was honored to be in such distinguished company. And hopefully I wld do subject justice. 1938 quaid in a palestine jalsa had turned jalsa into expose of his relationship with iqbal. Who he saw as a thinker an ideologue a visionary and a seer. He opnely acknowldged the spiritual force in iqbal. In 1940 in pak res quaid accepted that if iqbal had lived he wld have been pleased. Then I took crowd to 1924 when khilafat e usmania had broken down all. Complete colonization. Muslim lands were occupied. There was absolute darkness. Muslims had lost poleco power. There was no leadership. Iqbal at this point was sent as gift for entire world. Revivalist. Igniting fire of belief in dead nation. Gave vision that muslims will rise again. Regroup. Sabak phir par sadaaqat kaa. Adaalat ka shujaat ka. Liya jai ga tujh sai kaam dunya kii immamat ka In 1930 iqbal had openly said that muslim indpt state was needed. Incredible concept. 1931 quaid despondent n left for uk He triggered iqbal to do the following: create the nation, give goal to the nation, create nation state and finally iqbal created the leadership in quaid. This was his biggest gift. He went to uk to get quaid back and to convince him to lead the muslims. Aashiq ko faryaab wajib thee so wo ho chukki. Aab zara dil tham kar faryad ki taaseer dheikh. Pak was a true historical miracle considering there were no armies no economy. Just two critical ingredients: an ideology and brilliant leadership The same two ingredients were despararely needed now. His philo was as valid today as it was then. More critical now. Revival. I stressed need for finding solace in daily recitation of his thought. At this point I talked of need for purification and de extremism of society (in assembly I had used harsh words here I cloaked them) I talked of fact that we knew we were living in islamic rep of pak. I asked for an awakening. A true accomplishment of nation state thru a regrouped ideology of consensus away from extremist thought. I talked of tolerance for differences. I talked of getting rid of epedmic of extremism. I talked of state within state not being acceptable. And that we needed to expose all enemies to state. And that we wld not allow them to scuttle our vision. A real gap reduction of iqbal thought and where we were now. “

 

When I returned to my seat I cld see relief in everyones eyes. I think they were all pleasantly surprized. It was truly one of the most challenging crowds I have ever faced bec they were politically charged. though i must admit it wsnt as difficult as it looked..The rest of the speeches were more politically charged kaira got hooted down and qazi hussain had to come to his rescue. Ataulla haq kasmi and I hit it off really well. Whilst having tea and him having a smoke in middle of this backstage he presented me wth his books. He preferred my speech to those of many other seniors who had spoken. I was encouraged but I knew where I lacked. My command over urdu and urdu poetry was lacking. Something for me to build on. What I enjoyed was  kasmi telling me in middle of event how iqbal hated maulvis feudals etc. Wow! needed to learn all those quotes real fast !

As I left the event I got mobbed by the crowd who wanted autographs. I get great kick out of signing ‘pak first’ on these papers etc esp in such an anti musharraf crowd. They kept hooting join nawaz. And I told them I was no lota and was happy where I was. They got so hyper on this point that they got into a scuffle with each other. Fighting over me joining nawaz!!! I laughed and was happy to c my driver. Escaping from the mob was a challenge!

 

I sped to samaatv where saad and myself from lhr with fawzia in kchi etc were to debate doomsday failed state story. I enjoyed calling some people delusional matrix failed. But at the end of all the showmanship. I gave what I thought were suggestions close to my heart: madrassa reform- define state limits on excersise of religion. Protect all firqas thru punishment if violated.

At the edn of this, I Rushed to the airport. Was happy to see fellow best friend mna on same flight. Within my party we have a gang of 3 who share the exact same birthday and we r v close in terms of ideology etc. We stand up for each other n function well as a team. Whilst I pigged on bad snacks since I was famished my fellow mna brought me upto speed with party gossip. I am proud of him bec he is the best husband and father I have seen in terms of mna. His family comes first. When we r stuck in longwinded meetings etc and he has commitments wth his kids he will jst stand up n go. I respect that a lot.

 Anyway. I am back in isb. I am exhausted. It was roller coaster day but I learnt so much. I am excited abt learning iqbal and quoting iqbal. This learning process is such a thrill. Learning is thrilling. Bettering oneself is satisfying. Its a positive process…

 

I need to ctach a flight for skurdu in mornin. I have two advisors /ministers from gb on same flight. Kaira the minister ofcourse won’t go. Its all a matter of how close u feel to the soil. Blessed r those who feel close to the soil. its a blessing to love the soil-

Its bad circumstances that r taking me there. I have been told by media that 15,000 people r doing dharna in skurdu asking gilgit capital be shifted to skurdu since gilgit has seen too much bloodshed!! Tomorw will b ruff day. I will need to deal wth many such issues. Its not a small crisis and this area of mine has seen too many of these crisis. But as party chief this is my job. its the toughest territory in pakistan and people often are surprized how my party leadership has given me this job of party chief being young and woman- but i am grateful for their trust and the opportunity to serve–

As far as my northern people are concerned… Atleast I am part of their dukh sukh. That’s my farz and that’s why its so important for me to go despite loved ones giving advice not to go.